What's Your Superpower?
the magic we long for is the life we’re building.
Dear Friends,
February was full to the brim. Teaching, learning, work, winter illnesses. And then it snowed again. Maybe you heard? A blizzard left us with 2 feet of snow.
A voluminous blanket of freshly fallen snow is one of my most favorite things on earth. Yet there are too many people living here for the snow to stay delightful for long. Eight million inhabitants (and their pets) are quick to ravage everything in their path. It only takes a New York minute for the snow to deteriorate into garbage igloos, frozen urine, and poopsicles. Then it starts to melt, like a thawing archeological dig, revealing the grossest artifacts you’ve ever seen.
But for one glorious day it is like a fairytale.
Recently this newsletter received an unexpected influx of new subscribers. Hi! Thank you for being here. I suspect it has something to do with painting, so perhaps you have no idea how random and deeply personal these posts can get.
If you are new here, let’s just clear a few things up now before it gets awkward.
I am pro-choice, feminist, and secular. I am the daughter of immigrants. I voted for Obama twice. I’m not a violent person, but will gladly punch a nazi in the face. I am deathly allergic to bullshit, so with everything going on it is a miracle I am alive today.
Full transparency is the best social filter, isn’t it? This publication is part candor, part process, part slice of life. Art projects are woven in, and art is inseparable from lived experience.
Oh, and I’m also a mom. I’ve been a parent for a little over a year now, which is less time than I spent earning my master’s degree, which is crazy to think about. It’s all new to me still, so sometimes I reflect upon that recent tectonic shift in my life here.
Having a child has unearthed many of my own childhood memories. Maybe this is why I’ve been thinking about superpowers a lot these last few months. Don’t all kids dream of having at least one superpower? As I’ve gotten older, the desire for a supernatural skill has changed a bit, and I find each yearning very revealing of the stage of life that I’m in.
Superpowers I wish I had:
Age 5: telepathy + the ability to communicate with animals.
Age 20: omnilingualism — aka the ability to fluently understand, speak, read, and write any language.
Age 37: the power to bend time.
If I could choose to have any superpower today, it would be to slow down time, add time, or create time. What new parent wouldn’t love to have an extra hour of sleep, or more time to do the ten thousand things that need to get done every day? My daughter had an ear infection this month, and I was blown away by how much time it took just to administer her medications, on top of everything else.
Having a baby has also renewed my interest in telepathy, because for the first year of life she had the vocabulary of a small bear.
How are the superpowers we long for indicative of what we’re trying to build in our lives?
As a 5-year-old, my desire to communicate with animals was a broader sign that I was attempting to understand the earth and our fellow inhabitants. This is actually something I carried into adulthood, having worked at animal shelters and later as a falconer’s assistant with Burren Birds of Prey. I may not have gained the ability to telepathically speak with animals, but I do have a better understanding and a deeper respect for them now.
In my 20s I traveled and grew more interested in people, hence the desire for omnilingualism. I have no natural knack for languages, not like my cousin Alex who is a legitimate polyglot. Alex speaks a dozen languages fluently and is learning a few more. I did not get this gene. But in that decade I did end up making many new international friends, I learned how to say “thank you” in 20 different languages, and found that gratitude is the most important thing to be able to universally express.
So in this new chapter of life, what is my desire for more time trying to teach me?
Our desires for a superpower tend to illuminate the places where we feel limited, and therefore the direction we’re stretching toward.
I frequently find myself exasperated at the clock, sometimes feeling as though I don’t have enough time to do anything beyond what is needed to survive. Time is the ultimate luxury. It is precisely for this reason I added three extra time-consuming things to my schedule in February. I needed to learn how to stretch my time, and my capacity for appreciating it.
Things I made more time for this month:
Meditation. After reading The Art of Happiness by the Dalai Lama, I realized that whenever I feel like I don’t have time to meditate, that’s when I need it most.
Painted every day for at least 10 minutes.
Took classes with my favorite children’s book illustrator, Carson Ellis.
I am usually in the teacher’s seat, so it was great to be a student again. Below is a drawing I made during Carson’s class (which I highly recommend) using her Transmundane Character prompt: “Has freckles, wearing a skirt with a beautiful pattern, covered in fur.” I wasn’t nearly as imaginative as the other participants. I’ve been reading too many Richard Scarry books to Lumi, and just drew the first thing that came to mind.
Nobody asked for this, but I also tasked myself with painting for at least 10 minutes every day for 30 days. I have always been terrible at sticking to things like this and at first it felt very why-did-I-take-this-on, but I am almost at the end now and it truly did expand my sense of time. It made the days feel longer and less harried somehow.
This shift restored a sense of agency. And agency changes our experience of time. Being more intentional helped to change my perception of time by anchoring me in presence. I didn’t add more hours to the day, but deliberately choosing to slow down made each day feel more spacious.
Here’s 25 days of painting in no particular order:
I’m beginning to believe that if we tune into the magic we long for, it can give us blueprints for the life we want to build. We just have to pay attention.
If you could choose a superpower, what would it be?
What abilities do you wish you had? And what powers have you gained along the way that are part of the magic you bring to the world now? Here are some of mine.
3 superpowers I have now:
I can draw a silly cat on demand. I developed this superpower recently, as my daughter has been learning how to talk. Whenever we play with her crayons (daily), she requests (relentlessly) that I draw a cat. Amazing what we can learn to do under pressure.
I can squeal like a dolphin. Bizarre party trick, kids love it. Maybe I can talk to animals after all?
I make good chocolate chip cookies. They are enjoyed in every language.
Drop me a line, and tell me which superpowers you wish you possessed, as well as the ones you’ve already got. I love hearing from you.
Thanks for reading.
Love,
Melanie
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♥
Love your reflections here and this is my favorite part: ”I’m beginning to believe that if we tune into the magic we long for, it can give us blueprints for the life we want to build. We just have to pay attention.” Completely agree with your insight.
I have always wished I could fly, like a bird. Another one would be being able to be invisible whenever I want. And finally: time travel!